Thank Yous

1 February 2012

 

Haven’t been on for a few days as I’ve been a very busy boy knocking down walls and digging up things and general man stuff like that. 

As a result I have a few belated thank yous to catch up on.

Firstly to Andrew and Lynn for a great night at Lynn’s birthday party. As always the gentleman I won’t mention what age she was but if you (((4x6)-(15-4)+8)x4-4)/2 then you’ll get the jist. 

A fun time was had by all and as it was another fancy dress do I went as Jeremy Kyle and Alena and Robyn went as two of my chavvie guests, so they didn’t have to do much prep at all. 

Paige, Lynn's daughter, dressed as the latest tech gadget, a flying iPod, and made her grand entrance by 'flying' head first down the stairs. There were some rather unkind suggestions that she had been indulging in some alcoholic beverages and that this influenced her choice of arrival mode but as she is still under-age these are obviously without foundation. Her later bouts of loud singing, falling over and telling everyone who would listen they were her best friend were apparently the result of concussion. 

A number of folk were very interested in my occupation (I'm a Concierge that’s a job with a French name) and what exactly it is I do.  However, I refused to divulge the secrets of my trade as to do so would contravene the rules as laid down by the Debonair International Concierging Klan Society, or D.I.C.K.S.

Also have to thank my little friend Reaper (Conor) from down ‘Sout’. He drove the whole way up from Dublin, or somewhere around there, for the party and back down the same night. Didn’t want to stay long, something to do with an arrest warrant I think. Wasn’t even my birthday but he presented me with a beautiful pen which he had made (yes, I said made) himself. He had hand carved it on a lathe and it is completely unique.  How cool is that?!

Made me feel a bit guilty actually as I usually refer to him as a ‘Leprechaun’ and a ‘gypsy’ on here. He is of course both of those things but I just felt guilty for saying it. I’ll get over it........oh........hang on............... yup, over it now. Actually he came to the party dressed as a gypsy which just proves my point (probably did a bit of tarmacing on the way up). Tried to claim he was a pirate but he didn't fool me.

He did however make a deeply moving speech, in Gaelic I think.....

"Der's a feckin pen fur ya, ya pace a Nordern shoite. Its fool a feckin doynamoite and when da toimer goes en a fortnoight it'll bloow yer feckin hand aff ya hignoorant pradestant coont"

I was deeply touched and will keep the pen in my breast pocket close to my heart.

My last thank you is to the great God, Obesity, who in her wisdom decided to allow me to lose...................wait for it...................... 4 1/2 lbs this week. After last week's gain this was a much needed moral booster and my chances of being the worlds sexiest man have been rekindled. Three more weeks like that and Bob's your uncle. Off to Spain for the weekend and since I don't like Spanish food (they don't do Heinz Beans. Freaks!) I should lose a bit more.