23
January 2012
Ok
folks, to you it may just be another dreary Monday morning with nothing to look
forward to but 5 days of laborious, unproductive work. To me, however, it’s the
big day of the week. The day that all my efforts have been directed towards.
The day that makes all other days worthwhile and reminds me that hard work and
belief in yourself can reward you with a feeling of success and fulfilment.
Yes!!! Its ‘WEIGH-IN DAY’
I woke this morning excited but a little apprehensive and made my way down to the bathroom. It’s always good to weigh yourself first thing as for some reason you’re at your lightest. I did my number ones straining to force out that last gram weighing drop. I squeezed my head as hard as possible to try and muster a number two but to no avail.
I touched the scales to start them up as for some reason with modern scales they need to warm up. They went to zero and I gingerly stepped on. I waited a moment and looked down. Nothing. Oh, my belly’s in the way. I lean forward slightly and there is my new weight blinking before my now wide and startled eyes. This is why I have lived on celery and bananas for a week. This is why I have avoided biscuits (except for teacakes) and chocolate and eaten chicken and a portion of beans for lunch.
I have GAINED 1 ½ lbs. WTF. I’m right back to where I started 2 weeks ago. I step off and back on again. No change. I try stretching upwards to make myself lighter and even try standing on one leg but nothing changes.
All that living in food denial, all that misery, all that battling not to eat the biscuits the tenants had left for me and my fellow Concierges (that’s a job with a French name).
I can’t f’ing believe it. I pass on my devastating news to Alena who sympathetically sniggers and tells me I must have been cheating. I feel a lot better, NOT!!!!!!!!!!
I sit and have a cup of coffee and try and make sense of this disaster. I rationalise that this is just a minor setback, my efforts were not in vain, I must be heavy boned or maybe the problem is glandular. Will I allow this to deter me? Will I give up and let my body fall in to floppy disrepair?
Too dam right I will!! I am off down to B&Q car park where there is a mobile chippy that does a ginormous bacon & egg soda and I’m gonna stuff it down my gub and then lick the grease off the paper it came in.
I feel better already.
Yes!!! Its ‘WEIGH-IN DAY’
I woke this morning excited but a little apprehensive and made my way down to the bathroom. It’s always good to weigh yourself first thing as for some reason you’re at your lightest. I did my number ones straining to force out that last gram weighing drop. I squeezed my head as hard as possible to try and muster a number two but to no avail.
I touched the scales to start them up as for some reason with modern scales they need to warm up. They went to zero and I gingerly stepped on. I waited a moment and looked down. Nothing. Oh, my belly’s in the way. I lean forward slightly and there is my new weight blinking before my now wide and startled eyes. This is why I have lived on celery and bananas for a week. This is why I have avoided biscuits (except for teacakes) and chocolate and eaten chicken and a portion of beans for lunch.
I have GAINED 1 ½ lbs. WTF. I’m right back to where I started 2 weeks ago. I step off and back on again. No change. I try stretching upwards to make myself lighter and even try standing on one leg but nothing changes.
All that living in food denial, all that misery, all that battling not to eat the biscuits the tenants had left for me and my fellow Concierges (that’s a job with a French name).
I can’t f’ing believe it. I pass on my devastating news to Alena who sympathetically sniggers and tells me I must have been cheating. I feel a lot better, NOT!!!!!!!!!!
I sit and have a cup of coffee and try and make sense of this disaster. I rationalise that this is just a minor setback, my efforts were not in vain, I must be heavy boned or maybe the problem is glandular. Will I allow this to deter me? Will I give up and let my body fall in to floppy disrepair?
Too dam right I will!! I am off down to B&Q car park where there is a mobile chippy that does a ginormous bacon & egg soda and I’m gonna stuff it down my gub and then lick the grease off the paper it came in.
I feel better already.
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